August 16, 2009 228th day of 2009

Yesterday was my 43rd birthday! Wow! I know age is just a number but I can't believe I'm 43, I feel a lot older some days. I have been having trouble with my back for some time but I think the massages and the valium at bedtime has really helped a lot. Of course on Thursday night I got bit by a spider (at least that is what the doctor said) I have never woke up in so much pain during the night in my life (except when I went into strong labor with my second child). The kids are back in school, preschool, 7th grade and a senior!!! I really can't believe my baby is a senior. I actually cried the first day of school for her. Taking the preschooler was much easier.

My sister is now finished with her breast cancer treatment. What we thought was going to be a long 7 months seem to fly by. She did so well I'm so very proud of her.

My mom finally moved back to town after being gone since I was 7 years old. That didn't come out right; as a family we moved when I was 7; my sister moved back here when she was 19 I came back when I was 19 and my mom just moved back........I'm so glad to have her here. She will be very helpful with the kids.

06/17/09 168th day of 2009

We have been very busy this summer. Last day of school was May 29th; son left for camp on May 31st; oldest daughter left for vacation on June 1st. My sister had surgery on June 1st; youngest daughter started swimming lesson on June 1st for two weeks; the second week of lessons we also had VBS. There was a class of adults (which I joined) and found very rewarding. I haven't been to VBS in years. This week I've been trying to get youngest signed up for preschool........please pray we get a slot. My car was in the shop for 2 weeks getting a new transmission to the tune of $1800....ewwwwwwww.........thank God hubby paid. Youngest will turn 4 next Saturday so now we have to get ready for the party. Busy busy summertime. Better enjoy because school will start back before we are ready.

05.20.09 140th day of 2009

It's been a while since my last post. I've just not been on top of things since my aunt passed away. I'm still very sad.
My savings is growing a little each month and the credit card use isn't bad either. I've used the Belk card once & Penney's once. I owe less than $200 to Belk but the Penney's card is $700 *yuck*
School is almost over and the kids are very excited. I myself am finding it hard to believe it's the end of May soon. DH just bought a 'new to us' pontoon boat and now my transmission is screwing up........oh well things can't always be easy.

109th day of 2009..........April 19, 2009

My DD went to the prom last night..........she really had a great time. Her date is very sweet and cute. We have a very busy month coming up I need to put everything on a calendar so I don't forget something. Wondering what I'm getting my mom for mother's day. I really don't want to get her anything due to lack of money and the fact she's still making me feel about about the money I owe her. I will be receiving a tax refund the end of the month and believe me she will be paid first. I also have to get DD's 4th birthday party planned before time sneaks up on us. I think I will have the party in the yard with water fun. Thinking I will rent a water slide and have kiddie pools, water guns and sprinklers too.

82nd day of 2009 03.23.09

First off HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY SISTER!!!!!

In mourning...........I heard this song when I got in my car today. I haven't heard it before; it's really good. I looked up the title when I got home.........unbelievable. My grandfather always called my aunt Sissy. Strange things happen.

Sissy's Song by Alan Jackson

Why did she have to go
So young I just don't know why
Things happen half the time
Without reason without rhyme
Lovely, sweet young woman
Daughter, wife and mother
Makes no sense to me
I just have to believe

She flew up to Heaven on the wings of angels
By the clouds and stars and passed where no one sees
And she walks with Jesus and her loved ones waiting
And I know she's smiling saying
Don't worry 'bout me

Love ones left behind
Just trying to survive
And understand the why
Feeling so lost inside
Anger shot straight at God
Then asking for His love
Empty with disbelief
Just hoping that maybe

She flew up to Heaven on the wings of angels
By the clouds and stars and passed where no one sees
And she walks with Jesus and her loved ones waiting
And I know she's smiling saying
Don't worry 'bout me

It's hard to say goodbye
Her picture in my mind
Will always be of times I'll cherish
And I won't cry 'cause

She flew up to Heaven on the wings of angels
By the clouds and stars and passed where no one sees
And she walks with Jesus and her loved ones waiting
And I know she's smiling saying
Don't worry 'bout me
Don't worry 'bout me
Don't worry 'bout me

80th day of 2009..................March 21,2009

Why do I feel bad for owing my mom $700 when she spends $600+ on my brother monthly??!! And why does she make be feel bad about owing her this money? I will pay her back, yes it will take a while but she forks out loads of money for him all the time. She's paying $600 for his living arrangements and buying him EVERYTHING he needs. He is an alcoholic (trying to recover, again) and has always depended on her. I have a full time job, husband, kids and struggle every day to make ends meet but she don't help us. WHY?? I sometimes can't even afford to pay for the medicine I need each month. I swear if I had the money I would pay her back today and never ask her for another dime. Who's going to take care of her when she's old? ME ME ME!!! He won't. She thanks me for being her rock, well I'm sick of it all.

74th day of 2009................03.15.2009

In Loving Memory of

Aunt Gaynelle Lawrence

February 14 1945 - March 14 2009

"Far Side Banks of Jordan"

as performed by:

The Statler Brothers

I'll admit my steps are growing wearier each day

Still I've got a certain journey on my mind

Cares of this old world have ceased to make me want to stay

my one regret is leaving you behind.

If it proves to be His will that I am first to cross

somehow I've a feeling it will be

When it comes your time to travel likewise don't feel lost

For I will be the first one that you'll see.

And I'll be waiting on the far side banks of Jordan

I'll be sitting drawing pictures in the sand

And when I see you coming I will rise up with a shout

And come running through the shallow waters reaching for your hand.

Through this life we've labored long to earn our meager fare

It's brought us trembling hands and failing eyes

I'll just rest there on this shore and turn my eyes away

until you come then we'll see paradise.

And I'll be waiting on the far side banks of Jordan

I'll be sitting drawing pictures in the sand

And when I see you coming I will rise up with a shout

And come running through the shallow waters reaching for you hand.

And I'll be waiting on the far side banks of Jordan

I'll be sitting drawing pictures in the sand

And when I see you coming I will rise up with a shout

And come running through the shallow waters reaching for your hand.

And I'll be waiting on the far side banks of Jordan

Gaynelle I love you and will miss you dearly. I am so very sad you are gone but very thankful you didn't suffer in the end. All my hugs & kisses for you.